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4 ways to fight for your emotional health

“Staying emotionally healthy in an unhealthy world”

I haven’t always lived on the healthy side of things. Face it. You haven’t either. When someone says something nasty to me I want to get nasty right back. I am willing to bet you have felt this way as well. The goal is to stay emotionally healthy in an unhealthy world.

The only real question is: How do I live an emotionally healthy life?










Have you ever been in an argument?

Then, after the arugment ended you felt the need justify our thoughts and actions?

We say things like, “They deserved it” or “I am only human.” It some effort to make ourselves feel better, but deep down we know that we were wrong. You heard the old saying, “Two wrongs don’t make a right?”  Well as much as two wrongs feel good it may not be the best way to handle things. Actually, if we are honest, this behavior is a sign of emotionally unhealthy we are.

[clickandtweet handle=”@Jim_Burgoon” hashtag=”#soulcare” related=”jimburgoon.org” layout=”card” position=””]Going back at others is often a sign of how emotionally unhealthy we are.[/clickandtweet]

I remember when my wife and I were disagreeing “loudly”. You know the type of disagreeing that I am talking about? The one you don’t want to admit was an argument, but you know that it was one.

She said some mean things to mean. I, without skipping a beat, said some mean things back. I immediately regretted my words. Words cannot be taken back once they have been been said.

Words cannot be taken back once that have been said. 

I didn’t like hurting her. I didn’t even think about the words as they were coming out. I had said them and now I had to pay the consequences for them. Seeing her hurt was the worst of all.

It was during times like these that I decided that I wanted to be emotionally healthy.

Here are 4 life lessons that I have learned in my strive to be healthy:

1.Being healthy must be intentional 

Becoming emotionally healthy doesn’t happen by accident. It must be intentional. Meaning you have to work on it. On purpose!

Even if you don’t know how to go about becoming emotionally healthy you can decide today that you will commit your life to discovery and application.

2.You have to fight (Hard) against the urges to engage in unhealthy behavior

It is so hard to hold my tongue! I bet it is hard to hold yours as well. It is like I am just WAITING for the right moment to say something. You have to:


When I fight my basic need to lash out from being offended I am declaring that I will not be unhealthy anymore!  Make your stand! Take the high road!

When I fight my basic need to lash out from being offended I am declaring that I will not be unhealthy anymore.

3.Be aware of your behavior patterns.

Something dawned on me recently. That we operate in patterns and cycles.

When something is said in a certain way it triggers a cycle in me.

Those cycles are are keys to where I am unhealthy in my life. Learn to watch for them. I would also recommend that you ask someone to point them out. You must promise them not to get mad if they do!

4. Learn to accept responsibility for your unhealthiness and make changes accordingly.

Many people do not like to admit when they are wrong. Even more people do not like to accept the reality that we (ourselves) are a big part of the problem.

It is a tough pill to swallow. Learn to swallow it.

The more I am able to take responsibility for my actions and my unhealthiness the healthy I will ultimately become.

It is not an overnight miracle pill, but a life long journey we must walk.

Remember, There is no finish line in healthy living it is a life long journey.

[clickandtweet handle=”@jim_burgoon” hashtag=”#soulcare” related=”jimburgoon.org” layout=”card” position=””]There is no finish line in healthy living it is a life long journey.[/clickandtweet]

I haven’t always lived on the healthy side of things. As a matter of fact I feel like I fail more times then I am successful at being healthy. Everyday I wake up I strive to be healthy.

Each day you wake up you can do everything you can to be the healthiest version of you! You will fail, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just pick yourself up and move on.

Jesus tells me in Romans 8:1 that I do not have worry about being condemned because I belong to Jesus. Since that is true I can be at peace.  If Jesus won’t condemn me then I shouldn’t condemn myself.

I pick myself up. Learn from my mistakes. Make the appropriate apologies.

Learn how to make the right. Repent. Then I move on with my life.

No more condemnation of self. Just learning experiences that help me

the best version of me that I can be!

Question: What are some things that you have done that has helped you be more emotionally healthy? Join the conversation by commenting!

About the Author Jim

  • I love it – intentionality, that’s my favorite part. You’ve gotta take ownership over the health of your soul because the wounds that are there won’t heal themselves. Great stuff, thanks bud!

  • Diane Haenning says:

    Jim, I enjoyed reading your articles. Becoming emotionally healthy is something that applies to everyone, if they will admit it. I am looking forward to reading future messages from you. God bless you in continuing this important mission.

    • Jim says:

      You make an excellent point! So often what we need the most are the things we admit the least. I pray we all come to a place to admit that we need to be emotional healthy and then take the steps to get there! Thanks for the comment!

  • Michelle Strickland says:

    This has always been a battle for me. Although I don’t have to work at keeping my mouth shut as hard as I did when younger, there are still times it’s physically painful.
    This is a great lesson and much needed. I look forward to the next!

    • Jim says:

      I think we all have signs of the struggle we go through. Growing up in Philadelphia has left me with a mouth. In recentl years, I have been able to hold my tongue, but there are times. It can be a struggle for all of us, but the journey towards health is one step at a time. Thanks for the comment!

  • Joei says:

    Great article! I think we all struggle with these feelings. Thanks for sharing and putting yourself out there. It’s nice to know that others go through the same struggles.

    • Jim says:

      Thank you for the kind words! I am hoping that my struggles, and how I am continually working through them, can help others overcome theirs.

    • Jim says:

      Thank you for joining the conversation 🙂 Also, thank you for the continued encouragement!

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